Writing Trait/Strategy:

Adding details; organization

Description:

Some young writers have difficulty clearly conveying their message on paper. They know what they want to write about but struggle to capture their thoughts on paper in a way that is clear to the reader. This mini-lesson helps students see the need to clarify their information and include enough details for the reader. Model this technique by writing a “story” on the overhead or chart paper:

My brother has a dog.

Ask students what they think of your story. Most will say that you need to write more. Ask students what they want to know about your dog. They will ask questions such as, “What is its name? Where did you get it? What does it look like?” Write a second draft of your story, including answers to their questions. Help students to see that a writer needs to include enough details for the reader.

Extend this technique by having students read a draft of one of their stories to the class. Invite classmates to ask the writer questions that will help clarify the message. After sufficient modeling, this technique can also be used with writing partners.

After sufficient modeling, I encourage my students to begin asking the questions of themselves as they write. “What would my reader want to know about my story?”  With my developing and fluent writers, I expand the “asking questions” strategy by teaching them how to use planning sheets.

Writing Trait/Strategy:

Adding details; organization

Mentor Text Suggestions:

• Your own modeled writing—see description below
• The Quilt Story by Tony Johnston
• Laura Charlotte by Kathryn Galbraith
• Knots on a Counting Rope by Bill Martin, Jr.,
• The Hickory Chair by Lisa Fraustino
• Every Friday by Dan Yaccarino
• A Chair for My Mother by Vera Williams

Description:

To give students more practice in asking questions to help clarify their writing, I often use this technique as a brainstorming tool. We begin by making a list of all the questions we think the reader might want to have answered in the piece. Students answer the questions either orally or on a planning sheet before beginning their rough drafts. When using planning sheets for this prewriting activity, I always model how to go from the completed planning sheet to the first draft. Without sufficient modeling, students will end up just recopying the answers from the planning sheets. Following are two sample lessons that work well with this technique:

Special Object

Read aloud a picture book involving a character who owns a special object. The Quilt Story by Tony Johnston and Laura Charlotte by Kathryn Galbraith are good ones. Have students select an object that is special to them. Brainstorm questions that the reader will want to know, such as:

• Where did you get this object?
• Why is it special to you?
• How long have you had it?
• Have you ever misplaced it?
• Have students answer the questions and then write a first draft.

Student Sample:

Family Traditions

Read aloud a picture book involving a family tradition such as Knots on a Counting Rope by Bill Martin, Jr., The Hickory Chair by Lisa Fraustino , or A Chair for My Mother by Vera Williams . Give students the following assignment: “Make a list of some family traditions that are important to you. Think about holidays, birthdays, or other special events. Think also about everyday events that are traditions in your family. The traditions can be from the present or the past and can involve your entire family or just one member. Talk to other members of your family to get more ideas.”  I model first by making my own traditions list:

Have students complete planning sheets and drafts using the following questions as a guide:

• What is the tradition and how do you participate in it?
• Why is it important to you? Why do you love it?
• How does it make you feel?

Model by writing about one of your own family traditions. Here is one of mine:

Writing Trait/Strategy:

Ways with words; creating mind pictures for the reader

Mentor Text Suggestions:

• Night Noises by Mem Fox
• Widget by Lyn Rossiter McFarland
• The Painter by Peter Catalanotto
• Dad and Me by Peter Catalanotto
• Chrysanthemum by Kevin Henkes

Description:

Mark Twain said, “Don’t say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream.” In other words, show, don’t tell the reader what is happening. Instead of telling the reader that the character is happy, excited, angry, or scared, the writer should show it.

When reading aloud picture books to students, look for examples where the author shows rather than tells. For example, in Night Noises by Mem Fox, instead of telling the reader that Lily Laceby is old, Fox shows us: “Her hair was as wispy as cobwebs in ceilings. Her bones were as creaky as floorboards at midnight.”

These are the procedures I use to introduce this craft to my students:

1. Introduce the show-don’t-tell technique by acting out an emotion without telling students what it is. For example, act out “angry” by using body language and describing what you are thinking or feeling without using the word “angry.” Have students guess the emotion.
2. Next have students list as many emotion words as they can and call on volunteers to act out several emotions.
3. When you feel that students understand this concept, have them select an emotion to write about. Have them write a sentence or two, telling the emotion (e.g., “I was so happy when my dad said we could get a puppy.”
4. Have them write a second draft, showing rather than telling (e.g., “When my dad announced that we could get a puppy, I jumped off my chair and planted a kiss on his cheek!”).

In my experience teaching this technique I find that my students understand what I mean by “show, don’t tell” but they have difficulty incorporating it into their writing. To scaffold this for them, I go around the room and ask each student to tell their emotion word. As a class we collaborate to orally describe what the emotion might look like. They say that “excited” looks like “jumping up and down” or “proud” looks like “shoulders back and head held high.” Once we have done this oral practice, they find it much easier to “show” in their writing.

Student Samples:

Writing Trait/Strategy:

Where authors get ideas; ideas trait

Mentor Text Suggestions:

• Wildfred Gordon McDonald Partridge by Mem Fox
• Memory String by Eve Bunting
• The Memory Box by Mary Bahr
• Pictures from Our Vacation by Lynne Rae Perkins
• Letters to the Lake by Susan Swanson
• Night Tree by Eve Bunting
• When I Was Little by Jamie Lee Curtis

Description:

Some of the best topics come from our own memories. While it is important for writers to learn to generate their own topics, it is sometimes helpful to give them topics to jog their memories. These topics often become “seed” ideas for future poems, memoirs, or personal narratives. Below is a list of questions that can be used as writer’s notebook topics or just added to students’ personal writing territories or topics lists:

• What are your first memories of home?
• Have you ever moved? What was that like?
• What was your favorite activity as a preschooler? First grader?
• How did you make your first friend?
• How did you feel when your best friend moved away?
• Write about pets you’ve had over the years.
• What has been the most significant event in your life? Why?
• What are the small everyday moments that you treasure for some reason?
• Write about a trip you’ve taken that has had a lasting impact on you. It could be a cross-country vacation or a trip to the mall.
• Write about a special tradition your family celebrates.
• Interview family and friends about your past.
• Get out your old photos and free-write about them.

Reading aloud the picture books listed above is a great way to help students spark more memory topics. See below for some example lessons.

Read aloud Wildfred Gordon McDonald Partridge by Mem Fox. This book is about a young boy who tries to help his elderly friend regain her memory. After reading the book, have students bring in a shoebox or paper bag filled with 5 objects representing memories (something warm, something from long ago, something that makes you cry, something that makes you laugh, something as precious as gold). For 5 days have students share one object each day with a partner and then write about the memory.

Read aloud When I Was Little by Jamie Lee Curtis. In their writer’s notebooks, have students make a list beginning with “When I was little…”. I like to get them started by sharing a few of my own:

• When I was little, I colored all over the lampshade with a yellow crayon (my favorite color).
• When I was little, my brother and I hung socks over the bed slats underneath my bed.
• When I was little, I was afraid of people and wouldn’t talk to them.

Set a timer and have students write as many as they can think of. Then have them share their lists with their writing partners. Give them a couple of minutes to add to their lists ideas that may have been sparked by the sharing. Next have them circle one idea on the list, turn to a clean page in their writer’s notebooks, and write a full entry on this one topic.

Writing Trait/Strategy:

Ideas Trait

Mentor Text Suggestions:

• A Writer’s Notebook by Ralph Fletcher
• My Father’s Hands by Joanne Ryder
• "Ga-Ga’s Hands" from Confessions of a Pioneer Woman (website)
• The Important Book by Margaret Wise Brown
• A Tree is Nice by Janice Udry
• Big Mama’s and Shortcut by Donald Crews (Shortcut zooms in on one moment)
• Flotsam by David Weisner

Description:

Good writing has a clear sense of focus, but young writers usually struggle with this. They tend to write “bed-to-bed” stories, recounting an entire event or grocery list stories that are nothing more than a list of facts or events. The following mini-lessons help students take their “watermelon” ideas and focus them down to “seed” ideas.

Focused vs. Unfocused

Help students see the difference between a focused and unfocused piece of writing. On the overhead share two versions of a story written by you or a former student. One version should be a general, unfocused story such as “My Trip to Washington, D.C.”. The other should be a focused version of the story such as “My Visit to the Washington Monument.” Discuss what makes the second story a stronger piece of writing. Have students look through their own writing folders or writer’s notebooks to find a draft that could be revised to give it a stronger focus.

This child’s piece lacks focus.  It contains several topics which could be develop into several pieces of writing. Click to enlarge.

The following piece focuses on one event: a ride on Space Mountain.  Instead of writing about "My Spring Break" or even "My Trip to Florida" or "My Trip to Magic Kingdom", this writer chose to describe sensory images and feelings he experienced during this one event, making this a much more powerful piece.

Photo Album Analogy

Bring in a photo album containing pictures from a trip you have taken. Gather students around and ask if they would like to hear about your trip. Begin telling them how you got ready for the trip, what you packed, what the weather was like that day, how you got to the airport, etc. After telling the story, ask students what they thought of it. Most will probably admit that it was a boring story. Ask what they would like to know about your trip, encouraging them to ask specific questions. Open the photo album to one snapshot that shows an interesting or meaningful part of your trip. Tell a whole story about that one snapshot. Discuss the difference between the two stories. Lead students to see how focusing on one aspect of the trip makes for a much more interesting story than listing every insignificant detail.

A Lot About a Little

The Important Book by Margaret Wise Brown is a classic and has so many uses in the writing classroom. To use it as a lesson on focus, read it aloud to students and encourage them to notice how Brown takes each topic and describes it in detail to write “a lot about a little.” As a shared writing activity, select one of Brown’s topics and have students add more details about it. Have students write their own paragraphs—either elaborating on another topic from the book or selecting a topic of their choice. A Tree is Nice by Janice M. Udry is another great mentor text to model this technique.

Writing Small

Ralph Fletcher has a chapter called “Writing Small” in his book A Writer’s Notebook: Unlocking the Writer Within You. This chapter can be paraphrased or read aloud to students to introduce the idea of focusing their writing. Fletcher encourages writers to notice the small details and to write a lot about a little. He says “a single detail can sometimes give a window into a person’s whole life.”

The Rule of “Write About a Pebble

In Lessons That Change Writers Nancie Atwell describes a mini-lesson that was inspired by a student’s attempt to write a poem about pebbles. Nancie encouraged the student to write not about pebbles, but about one particular pebble. The premise behind this principle is “don’t write about a general idea or topic—write about a specific one.” Don’t write about friendship. Write about your friend. Don’t write about fall. Write about this fall day. Go to the window. Go outside. Observe.

Writing Trait/Strategy:

Ideas; write about what you know

Mentor Text Suggestions:

• Chrysanthemum by Kevin Henkes
• Gooney Bird Greene by Lois Lowry
• “My Name” from The House of Mango Street by Sandra Cisneros
• Journey by Patricia MacLachlan
• Baby name books
• Teacher original story modeled for students

Description:

I am always encouraging/reminding my students to “write about what you know,” and I look for ways to steer them toward meaningful topics. A topic that is near and dear to most children is their own names. I read aloud a book like Chrysanthemum to open the conversation about our names. I also bring in baby name books and allow them to search through to find the meanings of their names, other forms of their names, etc. I share with them that many authors have written about their names and that we can, too. To get them started, I write about my own name as they watch, and then I invite them to do the same. I am amazed at the type of writing this lesson inspires. Some children write about their nicknames and have humorous stories to tell. Others write about being made fun of because of their names and how that makes them feel. Some love their names and celebrate that in their pieces.

See below for a sample of modeled writing I did for my students about my name. Then read the writing samples of some of my students below. Notice the influence that my writing had on my students’ pieces. We can be powerful writing mentors for our students. (see Teachers as Writing Mentors)

Writing Trait/Strategy:

Ideas; prewriting strategies; techniques authors use to generate writing topics

Mentor Text Suggestions:

• My Map Book by Sara Fanelli
• Marshfield Dreams by Ralph Fletcher
• As the Crow Flies: A First Book of Maps by Gail Hartman
• The Once Upon a Time Map Book by B.B. Hennessy
• My Heart is a Magic House by Julie Jacobs (heart map)

Description:

I get a lot of mileage from this lesson. This activity helps students generate many possible writing topics. To introduce this strategy, I read aloud the picture book My Map Book by Sara Fanelli . I explain that mapping is an effective way for authors to explore a variety of topics. I show them the inside front cover of Ralph Fletcher’s Marshfield Dreams where he sketched his childhood neighborhood. The stories in this short memoir all take place in this neighborhood.

Have your students use their writer’s notebooks to do some mapping of their own. You might want to try heart mapping. This idea comes from Awakening the Heart: Exploring Poetry in Elementary and Middle School by Georgia Heard. Explain to students that writers speak from their hearts. They write about things they care deeply about. Ask students to look inside their hearts, find what really matters to them and then “map” their hearts. Questions to ask: What is in your heart? What has really affected you? What people are really important to you? What memories, secrets, fears, joys are in your heart?

You may also want to try neighborhood mapping. The first time I took part in this activity as a writer, I was amazed at the number of stories and memories that came flooding back to me. Before trying this with your students, I encourage you to try it yourself first and take note of what happens in your mind as you draw. After you finish sketching, try doing some quick writes on the following topics:

• What were your initial thoughts?
• What was your favorite place in your neighborhood?
• Who was the nicest person in your neighborhood?
• Where did you go to be alone?
• Were there any forbidden places in your neighborhood?
• Describe some of the sounds in your neighborhood.
• Describe some of the smells.
• Was there a place where everyone seemed to gather?

Click to enlarge photos.

Heart Map Student Sample

Neighborhood Map Student Samples

Writing Trait/Strategy:

Ideas Trait; Where authors get ideas

Mentor Text Suggestions:

• Arthur Writes a Story by Marc Brown
• Treasures of the Heart by Alice Ann Miller

Description:

Some students are always looking for the perfect topic to write a wonderful and exciting story.  They need to be reminded that the best stories come from their own personal experiences.  Read aloud Arthur Writes a Story by Marc Brown to illustrate this point.  Share with students the advice of William Carlos Williams: “Write what’s in front of your nose.”  Jeff Anderson adds, “You don’t have to write about big trips to Disney World, though you certainly can.  If all you ever write about are the things that happen to you at home or at school, that’s enough.  Ordinary things.  You’re welcome to write about anything, but the places and spaces where you spend time, that’s where you’ll know the details.  That’s how you can take readers anywhere, make them see and feel.” (Anderson, 2005)

I use the following techniques to  help my students mine topics from their own lives. You can find more lessons and activities at Helping Students Choose Topics.

Parent Letter and Writing Territories
Involve parents in the topic gathering process.  After all, they know their children and their experiences best.  Send home the parent letter and blank forms  and attach completed topics lists or writing territories to each student’s writing folder or writer’s notebook.

Chalkboard List
Designate a small section of your chalkboard to model topic selection throughout the day.  Encourage students to live a “writerly life” by being tuned in to possible writing topics that surface throughout the day. Tell them that writers are like insects—they always have their antennae up looking for ideas to write about. When a student shares something that would lend itself well to a writing topic, jot it down on the running topics list.  The ideas may come from books that are read together, personal experiences shared by individual students, or classroom experiences.  The topic may or may not pertain to every student.  Just jot it down and comment that it might make a good topic to write about.  Make additions to the list throughout the day.  When you run out of space, reread the list.  Invite students to record in their writer’s notebooks any topics they might like to write about in the future.  They can include these topics on their Writing Territories sheet.  Erase the chalkboard list and begin a new one.   (Adapted from 20 Tricky Writing Problems Solved! by Janiel Wagstaff).

Writing Trait/Strategy:

Ideas trait; studying how real authors work

Mentor Text Suggestions:

• Arthur Writes a Story v by Marc Brown
• Author: A True Story by Helen Lester
• Chester by Melanie Watt (revision)
• From Idea to Book by Pam Marchall
• From Pictures to Words by Janet Stevens
• How to Write Your Life Story by Ralph Fletcher
• If You Were a Writer by Joan Lowry Nixon
• Look at My Book by Loreen Leedy
• Nothing Happens on 90th Street by Roni Schotter
• Show, Don’t Tell: Secrets of Writing by Josephine Nobisso
• The Day Eddie Met the Author by Louise Borden
• The MEET THE AUTHOR SERIES published by Richard C. Owens Publishers. This series gives you a close-up look at many authors you will recognize.
• What Do Authors Do? by Eileen Christelow
• You Can Write a Story by Lisa Bullard
• You Have to Write by Janet Wong

Description:

As Katie Wood Ray says in Wondrous Words, “we don’t have students choose their own topics because it feels good—we have them choose their own topics because it matches what real writers do.” What other decisions do real writers make as they craft their writing? Why do they select a certain genre or text structure? Why do they use the words they do? Where do their ideas come from? Why do they even write in the first place?

An important way to use mentor authors is to study how they do their work and let students in on these authors’ secrets. We can do this in a variety of ways.

Ways to Study an Author’s Work and Processes

1. Attend author talks at conferences and share that information with our students.
2. Study professional books about authors’ work and use that information in our mini-lessons. Some helpful resources include:
   What a Writer Needs by Ralph Fletcher
   The Art of Teaching Writing by Lucy Calkins
   How Writers Write by Pamela Lloyd
   Shoptalk: Learning to Write Like Writers by Donald Murray
   Writing Toward Home: Tales and Lessons to Find Your Way by Georgia Heard
   Wild Mind: Living the Writer’s Life by Natalie Goldberg
   Reading Like a Writer by Francise Prose
3. Read aloud the picture books listed at the top of this page. These books all deal specifically with the act of writing and can be used to help students get inside the minds of writers.
4. Use the internet. There are many websites that provide biographical information about children’s authors, and many of them include advice or tips from the these authors. Click here for a list of helpful sites.

We can use all of this information to help students envision possibilities for their own writing and ask, “I wonder if I could do that?”

Below are some useful questions that can guide our discussions as we teach students to study how writers work:

• What is there in this author’s process that might work for me as a writer?”
• Where does this author get ideas? Could I try this too?”
• How did this author develop this idea before it was drafted? Could I try this too?
• How is this author already like me? How is he or she different from me as a writer?
• What authors mentored this writer? Could they be mentors for me as well?
• What does this author understand about writing that I had never thought about?
  (Ray, 1999)